Chuck Norris Facts At Kettlebell Kamp

Today at Kettlebell Kamp we started talking about all the Chuck Norris sayings. I'm not sure even how we got on that tangent, but these are pretty funny anyway. One I thought of was that Chuck Norris doesn't swing a kettlebell; the kettlebell swings itself out of fear in Chuck Norris' presence. Ok, ok I know it's a bit corny, but they all are. That's what make them funny. Here's some more for your reading pleasure.

Chuck Norris Facts

1. If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.

2. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

3. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.

4. Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell "What The Heck was That?"

5. Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.

6. When Chuck Norris works out the weights get sore.

7. The best part of waking up, is not Folgers in your cup, but knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.

8. If a tree falls in the forest, does anybody hear? Yes. Chuck Norris hears it. Chuck Norris can hear everything. Chuck Norris can hear the shrieking terror in your soul.

9. Chuck Norris eats a bowl of diamonds every morning.

10. When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn’t get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out.

More to come... I promise! :)